SUMMER!!!

Coffee on the veranda Summer is totally the boss. She’s the queen bee, the head honcho, the top dog. The boss of all the seasons. And why, you ask? Because I am sitting on my step in shorts and a tank top, sheltering my face from the gorgeous sun while writing this post. A breeze gently rustles the tree branches and birds can be heard chirping off in the distance. And I am not cold at all. AT ALL. Would I be brave enough to face the brutal elements in fall or spring? Probably NOT seeing as we still had snow in JUNE this year. Did you catch that…JUNE. Don’t even get me started on the insanity of winter.

There is very little bad I can say about summer. There are bad things that accompany summer like mosquitoes, ants, spiders, june bugs and ear wigs, flash rain showers and drought.  Heat rash. But they are all forgiven because, well…SUMMER!!!
Last night, I was chopping onions and green pepper for supper. I had chopped for fifteen minutes and then took my cutting board with the veggies over to my frying pan to scrape into my already sizzling hamburger. As I did, an earwig crawled out of the crack in the board and scurried upwards (ARGH!!!! don’t even get me started). I was immediately TOTALLY grossed out, but then I remembered: SUMMER!!!
Summer is the boss, and if summer means a few earwigs which I will chase out of my washcloths, cupboards and sink (bringing out my attractive MURDEROUS bent), so be it. Summer rules on this one.
Two nights ago, I was working on my Master’s thesis when out of no where, mosquitoes started to fly into my computer screen and hit me in the head. They appeared insane…I have no idea what they’ve been into, but they are just plain weird this year Of course, I wanted to scream (and MAYBE I did), but then I remembered….SUMMER!!
Three nights ago, a spark flew out of the fire pit and landed inside my shirt in some nether-region leaving an attractive inch long burn mark. I guess I was having too much fun to realize it at the time, having noticed the attractive camping souvenir two mornings later whilst in the shower. I guess if we are going to play with fire, we are going to get burned. At least that’s what the motto is in SUMMER. Summer this year also brought two weeks of cloud and rain. Whatevs, people. Is it cold out? Snowing? Is there ice on the driveway? AM I WEARING A SNOWSUIT?
I rest my case. Summer trumps everything.
BOOM
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The Joy of Summer Solstice…

It is about a million degrees in the house right now, this summer solstice evening.  I have just come downstairs for the umpteenth time, floating on heat waves as I ride the banister.  The last trip was to tuck my youngest daughter in bed with throw pillows and blankets all in place along with every other necessity placed around her, just so.  I am in no mood for negotiations- let’s get this show on the road.  I am almost about to leave the room when she gives me the look.  The “aren’t you forgetting something” look.

“What?” I ask impatiently.

“You know,” she says accusingly.  I follow her gaze to a heavy, pink shag throw blanket on the end of her bed that weighs as much as a small dog.  In the still of the moment, I can hear the CD she has picked out for this evening’s listening pleasure.  Rudolph the Red Nosed Reindeer.

Is this child for real?

“No,” I say firmly.  “No blanket tonight- it’s too hot.”

She starts. It begins as a low grinding noise and it will soon escalate into full throttle space shuttle mode if I don’t get that blasted buffalo rug wrapped as tightly around her as is humanly possible.  Is it possible to kill your child with kindness?   Because I have a little hotdog roasting up there over an open spit (a.k.a. the room temperature in her neck of the woods could fry an egg)

I leave the room to cool my jets, but then feel bad about storming out in a huff.  So, after a short cooling off of my own, I head back up into the furnace, walk in to her room, place my hand on her forehead, and she says this to me:

“I’m, like, SWEATING,” in her bestest Valley-girl voice.

No kidding, Sherlock, really?  Happy Summer Solstice to all my blog readers!